Giving Yourself More Credit by Jessica Reinsmoen
TW: Before reading this story, we want to warn you that there will be mention of potentially triggering mental health subjects. Also, this is based on one person’s experience and is not written from a doctor’s perspective. If you or someone you know may be living with mental illness, please get help. Talk to a licensed and qualified mental health professional and search the list of resources on our website
Have you ever felt like you do nothing? That you’re not as productive as you think you should be?
Society teaches us that we should give credit to ourselves with the “big” events in our lives – weddings, graduations, kids, etc. but what about the “little” tasks we do? Why shouldn’t we give ourselves credit for those as well?
Some may say that we shouldn’t because they’re menial; they don’t mean much in the scope of it all. But nobody is the same – we all have different energy levels, different ways of thinking, and different ways of how we live our lives. Why should we abide by a perspective of only giving ourselves credit for accomplishing so-called “big” tasks?
As a battler of depression, I see everything through a negative lens. It’s hard to be upbeat and happy when it feels like the world around me is cold and really, a downer. I don’t like thinking this way, and I grieve over the time when I didn’t have depression and could do more things that I thought were deserving of credit.
However, there is always hope and even in my depression fog, I found an exercise to do to battle these negative thoughts:
Changing My Perspective
1. Write down everything you did today.
Whether it’s in a journal, on your phone, in bullet points, or in paragraphs, write down every single thing you did. It doesn’t matter if it was alone or with a person, whether you think it is “big” or “small,” just remember to not be harsh on yourself. Think of it as simply listing facts – everything that you did, no ifs, ands, or buts.
2. Reflect.
Are any of the tasks that you listed things that you don’t usually do on a consistent basis? How do you feel when you do the task? Do you feel exhausted? Do you feel energized? Do you like doing it? Do you hate doing it? Are you doing it because you feel like you should? Or are you doing it because you want to?
3. Give yourself credit.
Treat yourself! Pat yourself on the back. You did ALL of that. No, there may not be a teacher coming to give you a gold star for your hard work, but this is where you must do the hardest part of all: accept the credit that you deserve and have worked so hard for – from yourself. Go, you! You may not feel immediate happiness, but doing this repeatedly will hopefully change your perspective on the world.
In the meantime, perhaps try giving yourself mini rewards after that you don’t give yourself often. For me it could be ordering my favorite food, giving back to a nonprofit, or starting a new puzzle. The possibilities are endless! Be sure to mix up the rewards so that you have variety and be mindful of them so that they are positively serving you.
Personally, doing this exercise helps me A LOT. Depression sucks almost all the energy out of me, so doing something that may seem very simple to some, like washing the dishes, is a pretty big task. So, to see that on my list at the end of the day is extremely rewarding.
I’m now at the point where I don’t have to write any of these down anymore. I’ve trained myself to recognize tasks and to give myself credit where it’s due. It has boosted my confidence and allowed me to set boundaries. I’m more in-tune with my energy levels, and what I feel like I can and cannot do in a day. Of course, there are days where I need to go back and write these things down, but having this in my mental health toolbox is important, and I hope it can help you too.
At the end of the day, it’s not about what you didn’t do, it’s about what you did do. Let’s give ourselves more credit for every single thing we do, not just what society says we should.
Need some help with identifying tasks you do in your day? Try these examples:
● You ate breakfast.
● You made your bed.
● You brushed your hair.
● You brushed your teeth.
● You rode your bike around the block.
● You took your dog on a walk.
● You took your medication.
● You washed your face.
● You applied for a job.
● You scheduled an appointment.
● You started a project for school.
● You texted/emailed someone back.
● You went outside.
● You got your hair done.
● You went on a shopping spree.
● You organized the pantry.
● You cooked food for your family.
● You made plans with a friend.
● You drank water.
● You took a nap.
● You read a book.
● You cuddled with your cat.
● You bought groceries.
● You laid out clothes for tomorrow.
● You started a puzzle.
● You sorted your laundry.
● You ordered a meal to eat.
● You got gas for your car.
● You flossed your teeth.
● You ate a vegetable.
● You quit your job.
● You meditated.
● You vacuumed your bedroom.
● You called your Grandma.
● You breathed.
● You lived your life.
Are there any tasks you think you should be giving yourself more credit for?
Additional tools for when you may be in crisis:
U.S. Crisis Text Line: 741-741
Ohio Mobile Response and Stabilization Services: 1-888-418-MRSS (6777)