Protecting Your Peace: A Guide to Navigating the Energy Arena of Life by Amanda Stoddard
Have you ever walked into a room and felt a shift in the environment, a feeling in the air you can’t quite place? Or suddenly all the eyes in the room meet your gaze and you feel that sensation in your body. Maybe you are walking through the mall or the store and you see someone’s expression change and you notice a shift in the environment. Sometimes we can feel that in our chest, become anxious or even self-conscious, and then our thoughts start to take over. Energy is all around us, it’s everywhere we go and everywhere we look. Adjusting to that energy can be overwhelming and intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be!
When we focus on protecting our energy so that the energies around us don’t have to invade our “energy bubble” it can help ground us in the present moment. This way we don’t take in other’s emotions, expressions, vibes, and energy. Imagine your energy field as if it were a bubble, what can we do to protect other energies from invading our energy bubble? Let’s look at some tips and tricks to help us handle mood-altering energy.
First, let’s ask ourselves a question: do we know when an energy feels negative versus when it feels positive? What does it feel like inside our bodies and our minds?
When you are having fun with a friend, what does it feel like? Joy, laughter, bliss, fun?
When you’re nervous before a test, what does that feel like? Anxiety, sweaty palms, heart racing? Would you consider either of these “good or bad” feelings and sensations? Keep in mind that emotions and feelings are all person-dependant, what feels not so good to you could be just fine for someone else and that is perfectly okay!
Now, think about all the times a day you listen to your body. What does listening to your body look like to you? Do you know how it feels when you’re hungry? Thirsty? Nervous? Overwhelmed? Do you listen to what your body is telling you in those moments? All of these check-ins can help guide you and ground you in your energy. The more we build up that self-trust and listen to our bodies, the more we can protect ourselves from energies that don’t feel good, and embrace energies that do! If you want to learn more about self-trust, check out our other blog and social media posts about self-trust.
Personally, navigating other people’s emotions and moods has always been a struggle for me. Growing up in a reactive environment led me to become hypervigilent, which means I am always scanning energies in the room to assess for threats, even when it may not be necessary. So to protect my energy I have to make sure I am constantly checking in with myself and doing what I need to do to protect myself. What does that look like?
A big energy arena for me is the grocery store. There are so many people, noises, colors, and smells, that it can be hard to stay connected to my energy and not pick up on the energy around me. To navigate this arena I always check in on my energy bubble, is it strong? Which would look like me being in a really good mood, high energy, and ready to tackle my grocery list. Or is it fragile? Which would look like me being in a hurry, nervous, annoyed, or ready to just get it over with. When I feel like my energy bubble is more fragile that day, I know it’s probably not the best idea to tackle that specific energy arena because I know that I am way more open to having my bubble invaded. But sometimes, we truly cannot schedule when we enter energy arenas or what our energy will look like when entering the arena. Take the doctor's office for example, it’s something we all have to do and sometimes when we walk through those doors we can feel the nervous energy in the air. Maybe people are annoyed because they have been waiting a while, maybe they are sick and tired, maybe they’re in a great mood because they’re excited to tell the doctor some good news about their health. Either way, there is A LOT of energy exchange happening in public places, especially the doctor’s office.
So let’s pause, and imagine all of those emotions and energies in that one waiting room. What does that feel like for you? Is it no problem at all? Is it overwhelming? Is it just a little dysregulating? Now if it feels fine for you great, your energy bubble is strong today. But what if it feels a little much energy-wise? What can we do in that moment?
Tip One: Check in with yourself. Try to really assess your own emotions outside of the influence of the people around you.
The lady across from you is vigorously shaking her leg, it’s causing you to be nervous too. Stop, and take a deep breath. Were you nervous before this moment? If not, ground yourself in that fact. I wasn’t nervous before, so this nervousness must be coming from somewhere else.
Tip Two: Do what you need to do to protect your energy. This is a great time to ask yourself some questions. What are the things I do that usually calm my nerves? How do I usually relax when I am starting to feel overwhelmed? Maybe it is doing a breathing exercise, playing a game on your phone, or texting a friend. Whatever that looks like to you, connect with something or someone that enforces your energy bubble to be stronger! It is also okay to completely remove yourself from a situation that is causing you stress.
Tip Three: This tip is more of a general rule of thumb, make sure you are connecting and uplifting your energy on your own time! Rest when you need to rest and listen to your body and what it needs. When you are feeling a certain emotion allow yourself the space and opportunity to move through that emotion. Building up our emotional awareness can help us understand why we are feeling a certain way around others. This can then help us to know what it is we need to protect our energies.
Tip Four: Have a mantra to help ground you through energies. This one is especially helpful for me as I am always aware of the energy of the room or anyone and everyone in the room. The mantra that helps me the most is “Other people’s emotions and energies are not my responsibility and have nothing to do with me”. This helps me prioritize my own energies and emotions above the others in the room.
You can use these tips to help guide you when it feels like the energy arena is too active and your energy bubble may be too fragile! The key in energy navigation is allow your body a space within itself to feel safe. Try to ground yourself in emotional and physical safety to protect your peace. This could look like a lot of different things we listed above and can also include you completely removing yourself from the environment altogether. Are there other tips and tricks that help you to navigate others' emotions and energies to protect your peace? Let us know by tagging us in a social media post or video!
As a side note: if you were raised in a highly unpredictable and emotional environment, or are still living through that currently, go easy on yourself. Our bodies are wired to constantly be on guard for threats to our environment, so if our caregivers, or even close friends or relatives are highly reactive people, protecting our energy can take more time and be a bit more difficult than people who are not in those situations. The best thing you can do for yourself if this is a situation you are dealing with is get help from a mental health professional to ensure you have a safe space to learn your emotions, how to handle them, and how to cope with those emotions. You got this!
Additional tools for when you may be in crisis:
U.S. Crisis Text Line: 741-741
Ohio Mobile Response and Stabilization Services: 1-888-418-MRSS (6777)